We all have a vice or 2 that we use to help us cope with the different challenging situations that we face in our lives. Some use alcohol, others drugs, sex, food, shopping, keeping busy etc, etc Let me be clear – one is not better than the other, they are all tools that are being used as coping mechanisms. The issue is this – when we use coping mechanisms we don’t address the issue that is in front of us (that we then use the coping mechanism to help us cope with the uncomfortable situation).
If you are to remove the coping mechanism we are left with a problem/issue that needs to be addressed.
What do we then do?? Address it!! Deal with it, fix it. Give the issue the attention it requires. Be responsible (Remember if it’s in front of you – there is something there for you.)
Coping mechanisms allow us to stay in uncomfortable situations way too long. They help to make the uncomfortable, comfortable without actually changing anything.
Here’s the key that you need to understand.
The situation is uncomfortable because it is requiring something of you. A boundary, action, responsibility, a voice, change, personal growth or even a new understanding/ level of awareness. When you apply the appropriate action from the above list to the uncomfortable situation – it creates movement (releasing the energetic block) releasing that uncomfortable feeling/ situation.
Using alcohol/ drugs or any other vice is just dragging out the inevitable.
Have you ever heard the story about the frog that was placed in a pot of room temperature water on top of the stove? The water was comfortable and was being heated up slowly so it never actually realised it was being cooked until it was too late?? This is what happens to us when we allow vices into our lives, it allows us to put up with situations/ people/ experiences that are really not ok for our health but they help us “cope”.
So now there are 2 questions that need to be asked.
1. What situations need your attention when you “remove” your vice?
2. Keeping your vice firmly where it is now (active and a regular part of your life) – what does your life look like in 6 months? 1 year? 5 years? 10 years?
This topic is worth taking sometime to meditate over, it is worth looking at your personal vices. What do they allow you to hide from? Can you give them up? Or is there a level of addiction there?
As I write that – there is no judgement. Only awareness. If you know where you are honestly, then you can take responsibility for that.
Finally is your vice the same as your parents? Did you watch your parents have a drink with dinner or every weekend and grow up thinking/ believing that not only was it acceptable but it was the done thing. Or did you watch your parents abuse their vice and have swung the other way to grip onto something different but it is still a vice none the less?
Have you as an adult ever questioned yourself over the above?
Vices are sneaky little suckers. Your quality of life, the quality of your energy are all affected with these vices.
This topic is worth talking about, it is worth taking the time to think about. You are free to make whatever life choices you feel is right. This is your life, your soul experience.
My job is to push a button or 2 and give food for thought.
My final point on this topic is this – watch out for shame. Shame has no place in you getting healthy. You will heal yourself faster and more completely by loving whatever you may find within you, shame will not only slow the process but derail it. Shame has no space in this topic at all. So be sure to show it the door.
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